White People Won't Save You

The Indian in The Cupboard (Feat. Craig Hale)

We refuse to accept this movie as anything other than a fever dream because WOW! If "this hasn't aged well" was...well, a movie, it would be 1995's The Indian in The Cupboard. Directed by Frank Oz (the man behind Yoda and Ms. Piggy), we've got a lot to say about this one. 
And joining us once again is the terrific Craig Hale! Together we break down a very chaotic movie. How the hell does this cupboard work (time travel?) How does it compare to the original book? And what in the world was the intention behind making his best friend South Asian? 
Catch Craig on the Decoded Horror network where they provided a voice for Graveyard Orbit, a queer speculative fiction podcast that sounds spooky and a lot of fun. And follow them @catharticus on Twitter for more! 
As always, you can find us on Twitter @white_pod and hit us up at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com We'll be back next week with Extraction! 
 

The Bodyguard (Feat. Rhayne Coleman)

And IIIIIIIIIIIIIII (deep breath) can't believe Kevin Costner is back again. Yes, this marks the 4th time we've had to talk about this man, this time for the 1992 romantic thriller (?) The Bodyguard. 
We're joined again by friend of the show Rhayne Coleman to discuss Whitney Houston's film debut. None of us had seen it since we were young, and it was quite a different experience seeing it in 2023. 
We talk what was up with Keven Costner's hair, why they kept letting that Black boy near the water, and who we would cast in a modern remake. 
Find Rhayne on Twitter and Instagram @carefreeblerd to check out all of his amazing tv and film reviews and check out his episodes here. 
As always, you can find us @white_pod on Twitter and email us at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com We'll be back next week with The Indian in the Cupboard! 

Disney’s Tarzan (Feat. Dare Johnson)

Guess who's bizzack? Hollywood's favorite super colonizer returns, as we also welcome back Dare Johnson to discuss Disney's Tarzan. 
What separates this entry from all the previous ones in the series? How about Disney's decision to just...remove all the Black people from Africa? Also, we discuss the best animated film staring an unlikely actor (Bee Movie anyone), an you know we had to flame Kevin McCarthy's dumb ass. 
You can find Dare on Twitter and Instagram @badicaldude! Follow for all of your Anime and Spongebob needs. 
You can find us on Twitter @white_pod and at whitepeoplewontsaveyou@gmail.com
As always, we love you! See you next week with more Caucacity!

College Kickboxers

Happy New Year! We're back on our bullshit for 2023 starting the year right with a gift from the Tubi Gods, the 1991 kung-fu film, College Kickboxers. 
Look, given the title of the movie, you already know what this one is. Filled with all the tropes, it's Karate Kid with 90% more racism and Power Rangers level fight scenes. And we have by far our favorite villain in a while, the iconic Craig Tanner. 
We hope 2023 is treating you right, or at least better than Kevin McCarthy. Tell us what movies you'd like to see us do this year over at @white_pod on Twitter or at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com 
We've got some great episodes coming up this year, so get ready for more caucacity and we'll see you next week! 

2022 Wrap Up Part Two

One more time, we review the year that was. Starting with....*sigh* Black men acting foolish. We discuss Kanye and Kyrie as well as the continuing fall out from "The Slap". 
Then we get into TV, talking about Atlanta's final season and other favorites. And we wrap with our favorite topic, movies as we talk more Everything Everywhere All At Once and  more favorites!
We can't thank you enough for spending your time with us this year. We hope we've giving you some laughs, some insight, and saved you from watching some terrible films! We'll be back in 2023 with all of the terrible movies Jordan recently found, including one with Steven Segal!
Happy New Year! 

2022 Wrap up Part One!

Happy (almost) New Year! It's been a big year for your boys and we're so happy to recap 2022 with you all. You all know we love to talk so we've broken this down into two parts. 
On part one, we discuss our year on the pod (that we talked with Roy Wood Jr. is still crazy) and get into this years books, comics, and music. For a look at all of our recommendations, check out our Twitter (@white_Pod). 
 

Operation Christmas Drop (Feat. Carmen Clark)

Happy holidays everyone! We continue our tradition from last year as Jordan's sister Carmen returns to the show to talk the disastrous Netflix Christmas movie, Operation Christmas Drop. 
Nothing says holiday romance like the military industrial complex, out of context Gaelic Christmas carols, and a cartoon CGI gecko. We also discuss the real life history of Guam, what the Blackest Christmas song is, and Trump NFT's. 
We love you and hope you have a wonderful holiday season with your loved ones. Take care of yourselves and stay warm! We'll be back to wrap up the year in Black culture, but until then you can find us on Twitter at @white_pod or email us at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com  

The Legend of Tarzan (2016)

Fire up that Tarzan pack because we're smoking that Legend of Tarzan on this weeks episode. 
Where do you even start with this one? Their idea to modernize and update Tarzan from his racists roots is to...have him end slavery in Africa? And use the real life genocide in the Congo by King Leopold II as a backdrop? And have Samuel L. Jackson portray a real life historical figure who has to *checks notes* convince Tarzan he wasn't going to lick a gorilla's scrotum? 
Yeeeaaaahhhhh, this one is on the third level for sure. And as far as rebooting Tarzan, we got thoughts on that too. 
We got two more episodes this year for y'all! Our holiday episode and our year end culture wrap up so stay tuned for those! Also, be sure to hit us up with any movies or thoughts for what you'd like to see in 2023! You can find us as always at @white_pod on Twitter and send us your thoughts at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com 

Last Airbender (Feat. Steven Underwood)

M. Night the last racebender? That's right, we're finally talking about the 2010 live action (Avatar) The Last Airbender from the one and only M. Night Shyamalan. Sadly Cameron had to miss out on this masterpiece, but luckily we're joined by cultural critic extraordinaire and author of the forthcoming Forever For the Culture: Notes From the New Black Digital Arts Renaissance, Steven Underwood.
Steven and Jordan discuss what the hell went wrong in adapting this beloved animated series. Was it casting white actors as the leads? Was it disregarding the brighter and more fun tone of the series? Was it all the dumb dancing? Also, a website for oppressed Karens?
Steven is an incredible writer whose work can be found on Oprah Daily, The Level, and Essence. You can follow him on Twitter and all other social media at @blaqueword. And look for the book coming in 2024! 
As for us, we'll be going down with the ship on Twitter @white_pod but you can always reach out to us at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com write to us and let us know if we made your Spotify wrapped! We'll be back next week with The Legend of Tarzan. 
 
 

A Family Thing (Feat. Bassey Ikpi)

One of these things is not like the other...it's Robert Duvall. That's right, we're talking about the perplexing 1996 movie A Family Thing. Long time listeners might recognize this as the movie Jordan's sister thought she was watching for the Black or White episode. Starring Robert Duvall and James Earl Jones, the movie fails by it's very premise of trying to convince us Robert Duvall is even .00000001% Black. 
We're so excited to be joined by the legendary and hilarious Bassey Ikpi (I'm Telling the Truth but I'm Lying) to break down all the ways this movie went wrong. From the relationship between the two "brothers" to the big mamma trope, to where exactly does "nigger town" begin and end. 
Bassey is one of the funniest and thoughtful people around! Her writing on mental health is incredible stuff and her book is a must read. You can find her at www.basseyipi.com as well as Twitter (@basseyworld) and Instagram (@basseyworld)
We're still holding on to the strands of Twitter over at @white_pod and you can always reach us at whitepeoplewontsaveyoupod@gmail.com 
We've got more Wakanda Forever coverage coming your way soon, as well as some end of year wrap ups and our second annual Holiday episode, so stay tuned!